Your day had started well enough as you got your bicycle out of the garage, but 10 minutes have passed since then and a part of your anatomy has just doubled in number owing to the SWO ripping you a new one for cycling down the plastic path.

Having composed yourself you head for Heroes to grab a coffee before work.  You aren’t in work long before you wander to the med centre and after the merest of waits you are in with the Doc and shortly after that heading out again.  You’ve been referred to the physio too but that’s for another day.  A spot of lunch in the JRM and it isn’t long before you slip into your No 1 uniform in your relatively new, single-person SLAM room and head for the officers’ mess for the award of your operational medal.  On the way back to work you go via TD Flight to get an admin order signed for a spot of AT for you and your mates, before finally popping into the gym to grab a bit of fizz, sign for some expensive outdoor kit and book a fitness test.  You’re not especially religious but you do notice the church as you head home via the spanking new main gate, nestled neatly alongside Chez Baxter.

Pay, allowances, appraisals, discipline, training, media, ceremonial, finance, medical, dental, chaplaincy, force protection, welfare, community support, safety, catering, infrastructure, resettlement, physical education, security, visits, adventurous training and sport.  All of this and far more besides is the work of a diverse and busy Base Support Wing.

So now use the coloured chart below to help decode some of your other daily Base Support Wing related activities and see how many times you actively draw upon the Wing for support.

• You’ve just filled your face with a classic lasagne like Augustus Gloop – it’s a red because not only Works Flight but also catering comes under Station Services Sqn.

• You’ve cut off one of your ears in an hilarious crew room dare – it’s a pink for getting treated and a quick trip to the dark blue to sign the accident book.

• After chewing a hard toffee you’ve pulled a filling – it’s pink again for the kind of first-rate dental treatment that in this case your money doesn’t need to buy.

• Hating both heights and the merciless banter of your crew room peers, you inexplicably opt for an FD day on the high ropes – this one’s easy; it’s light blue.

• Turns out that Thiepval Block ground floor foyer wasn’t built for 5-a-side football after all – you’re well and truly in the orange with a trip to the SWO closely followed by P1!

• Despite not having the first clue about school buildings you’ve found yourself as an augmentee in the middle of Helmand and now the tabloids are on your a** – it’s the left of the two greens for the Media Comms Officer and a quick front-pager on the RAF News.

• Having cycled yourself into a near state of coma to the Boston Stump and back, you find you’ve raised a ludicrous sum of money for a charitable cause – go to the right most green to offload your haul.

• This is either one very long continuous bleep or the gym just grew to the length of the Nevada Salt Flats; either way you’re up and down the basketball court blowing out of both hoops – light blue again for the RAFFT.

• You’ve taken the plunge and finally married your sweetheart that you once met at a friends wedding in Pontypridd – it’s another orange with PSF being all over the policy on this match made in heaven.

• And after all that sinning and talk of marriage, a trip to the Church is in order – it’s a big purple one this time from the padres…

• You’ve completed a hard day’s graft and it’s time to venture off unit through the shiny new Main Gate – that’s a red for delivery of the project.